📝 Alex's scrapbook

Fetters work 2025-08-23

Sep 19, 20254 min read

Gemini

bah, i got distracted, coming back to this a day later! can we start again?

I tweeted this today:

"oh yeah I think I've weakened the 4th and 5th fetters" said the guy who gets pissed off 100 times a day"

Of course. Welcome back! Distractions are part of the path. Let’s start again with fresh eyes.

That’s a brilliant and very honest tweet. It points directly to one of the most important and often misunderstood aspects of this process: the experience of “echoes” and “doubt” after a breakthrough.

What you’re describing is not a sign that your previous work was undone or that nothing happened. In fact, it’s a well-documented stage of weakening these particular fetters. The provided Fetters 4&5 Guide speaks directly to this:

  • Reactions are expected to return: The guide offers some crucial expectation management: “If these two fetters are just weakened, there may be the expectation that the push and pull won’t even start up any more. It will!“.

  • Doubt is normal: “One of the primary things to deal with here may be doubt”. Your tweet is a perfect expression of this doubt.

  • “Weakening” has a specific meaning: “Weakening these fetters means the reactions still come up, perhaps over and over again, but don’t overwhelm”. The goal is not the immediate absence of anger, but a change in its power and duration.

  • Echoes of old habits: The guide notes that even after seeing through the illusion, “Habitual reactive patterns
 can create huge echoes”. It can seem like reactions are starting up “when it’s really just being in a situation where reactions always DID start up”.

So, your experience of getting “pissed off” doesn’t invalidate your progress; it gives you the perfect opportunity to deepen it. Let’s use this as our new material.

From the “100 times a day” you got pissed off, can you pick one specific, recent example?

We are back at the beginning.

Step 1: Start with the Story

What is one specific story of you getting pissed off?

Summary of what we did

Of course. Here is a short summary of the two fetter weakening cycles we worked through today.

Summary of Today’s Inquiry

Today, you successfully applied the 12-step inquiry process to weaken both an aversion and a craving, which correspond to the 4th and 5th fetters (ill will and desire).

Cycle 1: Weakening Aversion

  • The Trigger: You began with a “micro-example” of being “pissed off” by a cleaner dragging chairs loudly in a hospital cafeteria.

  • The Factual Sentence: We distilled this story into the simple, observable fact: “The cafeteria is not quiet”.

  • The Inquiry: You identified the “first dart” as a “constricted, anxious feeling” in your sternum, which you rated as a subtle 1/10 in intensity.

  • The Result: After looking for the “button” or reason to react, the sensation dissolved, and you were left with a “very subtle feeling of happiness or pleasantness at realising how the [first] dart has dissolved and the second dart was an illusion”.

Cycle 2: Weakening Craving

  • The Trigger: You chose to work on a strong, “active” craving to check social media for validation on a piece of writing you had shared.

  • The Factual Sentence: This was refined into the specific, unmet desire: “My friend has not replied to say that I’m a great writer”.

  • The Inquiry: You described the “first dart” of craving as a 2/10 “pulling feeling from my chest,” like a “black hole feeling, with its own gravity”. Following your own insightful question, you engaged in a dedicated, prolonged search for the “button” compelling this craving and confirmed you could not find one.

  • The Result: The craving collapsed into a “simple, neutral fact,” replaced by a “subtle feeling of excitement/joy” at the realisation that you can actively dissolve cravings and aversions.

In both cycles, you followed the core principle of the guides: isolating a factual trigger, directly experiencing the associated “first dart” sensation, and seeing through the illusory “second dart” of reactivity by finding no inherent reason or “button” for it in your direct experience.

Graph View

Backlinks