- A friend has set me up with a possible role, and I have a call with the co-founder in 2.5 hours (unless I cancel, which I do kinda want to do, hence writing this)
- Their product manager is going on maternity leave so they’re looking for support to fill in the gaps whilst she’s out
- I did all the user-facing stuff at Refract (finding users, talking with and supporting them, bringing all the insight back) and a bunch of other work
- I have some vague context on what they’re working on, but more vibes and what my friend is excited about, rather than the exact shape of what they’re building
1. What are they working on?
Who are they?
Happier Meditation is an award winning app created to help you be a stronger, happier you — day in and day out, in good times and during the rough times. We have a library of resources in the app and elsewhere that have been curated to help you explore questions like:
- What the heck does it mean to be mindful?
- How do I meditate?
- What will meditation do for me? Can’t I just, “be mindful?”
- Will you help me practice meditation in a way that fits with my life and still helps me feel better?
- This is really interesting and helpful for me, how do I go deeper and find out more?
We got started in the general wellness business back in 2014, then started to collaborate with Dan Harris who wrote the book, 10% Happier Meditation. Now we have an app full of curated meditations, lessons, and content that continues to evolve based on our community’s needs, a weekly newsletter, and a website that’s chock full of resources.
I don’t know what they’re working on
- My friend is helping them build a cool new thing, which I think is an AI guide in their app
- From the description of my friend, it’s an extension of their meditation app, that is aiming to blend a bunch of modalities, integral theory stuff, etc etc, to get you to like… deep places, maybe aletheia style, etc, unclear but that’s the vibe
2. Why does it feel bad?
I’m not excited by meditation apps
- I’m not a user of meditation apps. I’ve used Headspace and Waking Up in the past and I just don’t like/care about them
- Even if they build an AI guide that helps get people to deeper states… idk, I’m just not that excited about apps atm. It feels to me like it’s not my path (unlike my friend, who is a very good software engineer, so it makes absolute sense for him). Something that I’ve been deepening into recently is this feeling that everything good in my life has been relational, through talking to/meeting amazing people. I want to further that path, rather than joining the “apps are the way” path, you know?
Non-wyrd (Wyrd)
- Maybe I should have a call just to learn more about what they’re building, but my current feeling is a fairly big “no”, which I’d be surprised if it changed
- When I worked for Refract, I really wanted to work at a startup, I was really excited about IFS, so I had consensus to do it. This time, I have no extant interest in (what it seems like) what they’re working on, I’m much more… if anything, I’m much more 1:1 help-pilled - the idea of working on an app doesn’t feel like The Way to me at all
Other opportunities
- There’s the opportunity to work in-person at the EA hotel, which would be much better for actually being embodied/enmeshed in the world, Heidegger vibes, plus the 1:1 helping angle
- I could help out at the EA Hotel, and it’d be objectively bad to have 2 jobs, 2 loads of priorities. That’s not the life I want. Maybe if they were both super aligned, but as Happier isn’t even aligned with my wyrd, it makes no sense
I’ve done this
- I have a sense that, I’ve done this at Refract, I did customer success stuff and it was fine, but idk, been there, done that, not the path, not the wyrd
3. Misc takes
I’m allowed to say no
- I’m really on my disagreeableness arc at the moment, and it feels very strange to keep turning down possible jobs (e.g. I’ve been invited to some private hiring rounds for EA organisations recently after I did very well at the Longview Philanthropy work trial, and I keep turning them down)
- There’s a scarcity mindset/peasant-brain thing of like “it’s immoral and bad to turn down opportunities, you should be grateful to have anything!” from being working class and etc, but actually, if it doesn’t align with my aliveness/wyrd/consensus, then it doesn’t make sense. I don’t need to jump at opportunities just because they present themselves, and Money is a solved issue
Is it dumb to not even have a call
- It probably makes sense to have a quick call just to get a better flavour of what they’re working on
- But, it feels very unlikely that they’d something that would suddenly change my wyrd, like, I know the path I’m on, and this isn’t on it, it seems - I currently don’t give a single shit about this, so what is the p(they say something that makes me really care)
- Care is the number 1 thing
The curse of high openness
- There’s a sense of “I should probably check this out just in case”, which I feel a lot
- Vs I think it’d be much better to just say no. Do I want to give, say, 3 hours of each weekday to this thing, which will be Refract-flavoured, a bigger company and more reach etc, but still ultimately an app? No, I have no interest in mental health/meditation apps at this point in time. All the profundity in my life re: this kind of stuff has been via 1:1 work with people
I have enough already
- I have 3+ awesome mentors. I have a strong intuition for where I’m going, and I think it’s helping people 1:1, in-person community, social fabric rebuilding, etc. It’s not tech, it’s not apps
Why do it?
- Money
- Probably a great team, well-running org
I love saying no
- It feels baller as hell to turn down possibly good opportunities, because there’s a strong intuition that they aren’t perfect/totally aligned/totally wyrd
- This feels like an unnecessary detour. It probably pays well, but I won’t be derailed by bullshit like money, I don’t need it right now! Everything is going well 😎 - It also feels pretty baller turning down a call with a co-founder because it’s not alive. In the past I had much more of a sense of like “I am an empty vessel with no plans I am I just thrilled to be considered”, etc, and in the last few months I’ve really felt much more Kegan 4 and selective, which I’m loving (although it’s definitely disorienting!)
I said no
Hey _,
I’ve been with a sense of this not feeling like a totally aligned/alive opportunity for a few days, and I’ve only just got around to properly sitting with it, and I think I’m going to save us both the time and cancel our call, apologies for doing this last minute!
(Of course, I don’t actually know much about what _ is working on apart from what we chatted about in a Berlin cafe, but I have a strong sense that remote work and meditation apps are not my path)
Wishing you guys luck with everything!
Best,
Alex