- A friend has set me up with a possible role, and I have a call with the co-founder in 2.5 hours (unless I cancel, which I do kinda want to do, hence writing this)
- Their product manager is going on maternity leave so theyāre looking for support to fill in the gaps whilst sheās out
- I did all the user-facing stuff at Refract (finding users, talking with and supporting them, bringing all the insight back) and a bunch of other work
- I have some vague context on what theyāre working on, but more vibes and what my friend is excited about, rather than the exact shape of what theyāre building
1. What are they working on?
Who are they?
Happier Meditation is an award winning app created to help you be a stronger, happier you ā day in and day out, in good times and during the rough times. We have a library of resources in the app and elsewhere that have been curated to help you explore questions like:
- What the heck does it mean to be mindful?
- How do I meditate?
- What will meditation do for me? Canāt I just, ābe mindful?ā
- Will you help me practice meditation in a way that fits with my life and still helps me feel better?
- This is really interesting and helpful for me, how do I go deeper and find out more?
We got started in the general wellness business back in 2014, then started to collaborate with Dan Harris who wrote the book, 10%Ā Happier Meditation. Now we have an app full of curated meditations, lessons, and content that continues to evolve based on our communityās needs, Ā a weekly newsletter, and a website thatās chock full of resources.
I donāt know what theyāre working on
- My friend is helping them build a cool new thing, which I think is an AI guide in their app
- From the description of my friend, itās an extension of their meditation app, that is aiming to blend a bunch of modalities, integral theory stuff, etc etc, to get you to likeā¦ deep places, maybe aletheia style, etc, unclear but thatās the vibe
2. Why does it feel bad?
Iām not excited by meditation apps
- Iām not a user of meditation apps. Iāve used Headspace and Waking Up in the past and I just donāt like/care about them
- Even if they build an AI guide that helps get people to deeper statesā¦ idk, Iām just not that excited about apps atm. It feels to me like itās not my path (unlike my friend, who is a very good software engineer, so it makes absolute sense for him). Something that Iāve been deepening into recently is this feeling that everything good in my life has been relational, through talking to/meeting amazing people. I want to further that path, rather than joining the āapps are the wayā path, you know?
Non-wyrd (Wyrd)
- Maybe I should have a call just to learn more about what theyāre building, but my current feeling is a fairly big ānoā, which Iād be surprised if it changed
- When I worked for Refract, I really wanted to work at a startup, I was really excited about IFS, so I had consensus to do it. This time, I have no extant interest in (what it seems like) what theyāre working on, Iām much moreā¦ if anything, Iām much more 1:1 help-pilled - the idea of working on an app doesnāt feel like The Way to me at all
Other opportunities
- Thereās the opportunity to work in-person at the EA hotel, which would be much better for actually being embodied/enmeshed in the world, Heidegger vibes, plus the 1:1 helping angle
- I could help out at the EA Hotel, and itād be objectively bad to have 2 jobs, 2 loads of priorities. Thatās not the life I want. Maybe if they were both super aligned, but as Happier isnāt even aligned with my wyrd, it makes no sense
Iāve done this
- I have a sense that, Iāve done this at Refract, I did customer success stuff and it was fine, but idk, been there, done that, not the path, not the wyrd
3. Misc takes
Iām allowed to say no
- Iām really on my disagreeableness arc at the moment, and it feels very strange to keep turning down possible jobs (e.g. Iāve been invited to some private hiring rounds for EA organisations recently after I did very well at the Longview Philanthropy work trial, and I keep turning them down)
- Thereās a scarcity mindset/peasant-brain thing of like āitās immoral and bad to turn down opportunities, you should be grateful to have anything!ā from being working class and etc, but actually, if it doesnāt align with my aliveness/wyrd/consensus, then it doesnāt make sense. I donāt need to jump at opportunities just because they present themselves, and Money is a solved issue
Is it dumb to not even have a call
- It probably makes sense to have a quick call just to get a better flavour of what theyāre working on
- But, it feels very unlikely that theyād something that would suddenly change my wyrd, like, I know the path Iām on, and this isnāt on it, it seems - I currently donāt give a single shit about this, so what is the p(they say something that makes me really care)
- Care is the number 1 thing
The curse of high openness
- Thereās a sense of āI should probably check this out just in caseā, which I feel a lot
- Vs I think itād be much better to just say no. Do I want to give, say, 3 hours of each weekday to this thing, which will be Refract-flavoured, a bigger company and more reach etc, but still ultimately an app? No, I have no interest in mental health/meditation apps at this point in time. All the profundity in my life re: this kind of stuff has been via 1:1 work with people
I have enough already
- I have 3+ awesome mentors. I have a strong intuition for where Iām going, and I think itās helping people 1:1, in-person community, social fabric rebuilding, etc. Itās not tech, itās not apps
Why do it?
- Money
- Probably a great team, well-running org
I love saying no
- It feels baller as hell to turn down possibly good opportunities, because thereās a strong intuition that they arenāt perfect/totally aligned/totally wyrd
- This feels like an unnecessary detour. It probably pays well, but I wonāt be derailed by bullshit like money, I donāt need it right now! Everything is going well š - It also feels pretty baller turning down a call with a co-founder because itās not alive. In the past I had much more of a sense of like āI am an empty vessel with no plans I am I just thrilled to be consideredā, etc, and in the last few months Iāve really felt much more Kegan 4 and selective, which Iām loving (although itās definitely disorienting!)
I said no
Hey _,
Iāve been with a sense of this not feeling like a totally aligned/alive opportunity for a few days, and Iāve only just got around to properly sitting with it, and I think Iām going to save us both the time and cancel our call, apologies for doing this last minute!
(Of course, I donāt actually know much about what _ is working on apart from what we chatted about in a Berlin cafe, but I have a strong sense that remote work and meditation apps are not my path)
Wishing you guys luck with everything!
Best,
Alex