What do you actually do, vs what do you say you value? Revealed preferences are more honest than stated preferences. We could look at how you actually spend your time and energy and reverse-engineer what that implies about what you care about.
- This’ll be a good one where I can probably lightly brain-dump right now
- I wouldn’t have explicitly said ”comedy is really important to me”, but I’ve listened to 1-3 hours of comedy podcasts daily for like, 7+ years at this point??? So, clearly very important to me. And my youtube algorithm has been e.g. Conan O’Brien + Smosh improv
- I also really like making people laugh, and it comes easily to me (with the right people!)
- I wouldn’t explicitly say that "getting attention" is a key thing to me, but it’s true - Leo sun, I love e.g. sending long voice notes, being on camera, doing silly presentations (e.g. at the EA hotel, I do a weekly “what happened this week” presentation and fill it with silly jokes)
- When there’s an attractive and charismatic woman in my life, a lot of my energy goes there!
- I don’t value exercise, I need social accountability to help me go to the gym. Would always rather do some enneagram 3 project-based shit, than go workout.
- I really love working and studying - I do this all the time, and I’m always onto the next project, the next thing to read, etc. I’ll spend my weekend catching up on stuff I wanna read about, making flashcards etc. Flashcards - Anki has been a habit for years, as had writing
- Growth as a revealed preference - always making notes on ideas, things to try, new things to think about, etc
- I don’t care about fiction that much - I’m not super drawn to reading new fiction books. Same with music actually, I listen to way less new music now (partly because it’s hard to find stuff I like)
- Messaging people! Group chat with 2 friends where we voice note for plausibly 1 hour a day (including sending and listening). And messaging some woman friends. And ignoring lots of other messages, lol
Prompts to help
Look at your last 14 days of history. Ignoring what you “meant” to do, where did your hours actually go?
- Work
- Studying (astrology lol)
- Gym (if other people go with me)
- Spent time with a lovely woman
- Trip to London with friends
- Circling (relational practice)
- Evening activities at the EA Hotel
Who am I irrationally jealous of right now? What specific resource or lifestyle trait do they have that I am secretly prioritizing, even if I tell people I don’t care about it?
- I like this idea of “who am I envious of”
- [person 1] for how they live by solid principles
- [person 2] for earning loads of money in a very cool-seeming way (they’re a venture capitalist) whilst also being a very emotionally cultivated person, meaning they recently married [person 3] and they can have an amazing life together
- 👆 person 2 is who I wanna be like!!! Earning great money in a very intellectually stimulating way, and having an amazing charismatic fire sign-coded wife, lol