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2026-03-15
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Quick messy thinking because I don’t really need to convince myself of anything here, it’s experientially obvious to me that messages are one of my key constant open loops & sources of stress
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Whatsapp, Signal, Telegram, Instagram DMs, Twitter DMs, texts, emails. The bane of my existence!
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Truly, a daily source of stress, for years!
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And, even when not stressing me out, it’s taking loads of time. How many hours spent in back-and-forths. They’re fun in the moment, but are they the best use of my time?
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E.g., as a very quick “imagining of a different way” - what if I had a monthly call with each friend, rather than the current status quo. Could actually save time and dramatically increase depth
If we’re not in person then we’re not in each other’s lives as much and that’s ok
- There’s a fallacy introduced which is like “we should keep in touch, because we can”
- I think I’d much prefer a thing of like “ok cool, I’ll call you in 6 months?”, with a friend who I’m not going to see for ages
- I no longer live in London, so my London friends are no longer in my life in a meaningful way, and IMO, that’s ok. I have new in person friends. You’ve gotta prioritise the chanda
Not to mention how many frickin times I check messaging apps per day
- Like, 50-100 times? Every time I context switch? Ridiculous dude. Nothing is ever that time-sensitive, I just want the dopamine, the feeling of connection